Lord, You have raised me from the ashes and crowned me with glory and honor. The ashes were my bitterness, when I was enslaved to my enemy. You have given me a new name, and the esteem of Your regard. You have called me, "SWEET child of mine". The beginning of this time of comfort came when I asked You to tell me why I am still tormented. You told me it was because I have not forgiven myself. I remember where You said that if you do not forgive, you cannot be forgiven. A scary thought. So I try to force myself to faith. I should know better. There is something to learn here.
Tonight, You have opened the veils of my eyes to see Your truth as You see. The stronghold on my mind is from the voices of others, so disapproving and hateful of me. YOU would never treat me so shabbily! The impulse is always to give them what they want. Isn't my survival at stake? No. Those voices are demonic, and seek to impugn the character of my God! They seek to separate me from His love by the imperative of negative emotions. But I already know anger robs of the ability to reason....or understand, even if it has it's purpose of giving us the energy to fight back. That is the stronghold over my very heart, but I must love YOU first and above all, in order to understand. Even my native stubbornness cannot overcome, by itself, an onslaught of constant pain. I must not believe the scolding and condemning voices, but seek Your voice, instead. Those voices are, after all, only demonic. In all reality, they are powerless. Their only control is if we believe their lies. They are not even the true voices of those I seek to love. Even the condemnng thoughts in my own head are the same evil forces, no more. They have no standing of truth.
My God is the One who creates beauty from ashes. My Savior is the One more powerful and loving than any. Graciousness is Yours! You give victory over all the power of the enemy!
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